A couple times a week, a young woman weaves her way through a large crowd on a World known strip. Tourista stare at her and wonder why she is in a hurry; everyone else is walking slow and enjoying paradise. This young woman is me. You would think that after a couple of years, my pace would have slowed down. But instead, my stride remains the same; sometimes it even increases. The reason why I'm like this is because I'm afraid that if I slow down for too long; I'll get too relaxed to the point where I get comfortable with where I'm currently at, and never move forward in life. The negative to always rushing is forgetting or loosing things along the way.
This past Spring break, I flew out to Maui. Before I went through the security check, I took off my chic hat and put it into the bin. After my bins went through the x-ray like system, I hurried to gather my possessions, then met up with my friends. When we were waiting for our call to board, I noticed I couldn't find my hat anywhere. Everything was happening so fast; I didn't notice the disappearance until after. I haven't been frequently blogging, since I can't find the charger to my digital camera. I would use the camera on my phone, but I lost that recently too.
When times like this happen, I just try to stay positive and remind myself that sometimes it is okay to slow down. In the past, I would stress off lost items. I learned to not mourn in negative energy; you can always replace those items in time. Besides, I've been due for an upgrade for a new phone. I plan to get an I-phone soon. I'm not really into touch screens, but I like how it has Instagram. So I can blog and edit frequently, while on the go.
A couple months ago, I was rushing into a local convenient store to purchase food before work. An older local man was working at the cashier register. He has seen me a couple times prior; each time I was rushing. One day, as he was ringing up my purchases, he laughed and said, "Take it easy." He was probably thinking why is this young lady always rushing in paradise? I just smiled, but I wish I could tell him this:
People always remind me that I am so lucky to live in "paradise," yes I agree with them I am very thankful and love it. But it annoys me when people find out where I live, they assume that all I do here is party and go to the beach. Yes, when I first moved here I was partying every other day; I lived in the dorms, a party atmosphere. It was my first year away from home; I was going to unleash and go crazy. As time passes by, you learn that the party is only temporary.
At the dorms, I've met so many people from all over the World. Many of them stayed for a week, one semester, or one year. They ended up going back home due to letting partying take over, financial problems, or just missed home. Some drop out of the university, and are satisfied working two minimum wage jobs. School isn't for everyone; what I learned is that if you do choose the school route, time equals money. No one is perfect, even I messed up a couple times. Luckily, I have patient parents; they love me unconditionally, and give me chances to redeem myself. I am also thankful for my support systems in the mainland and on the island, who encourage me to keep going and believing.
Recently, I requested to have my hours cut at work. This was really hard for me, since I am a workaholic. The reason why I was addicted to work is because it is the only place on the island where I feel safe, productive, and earning all at the same time. I didn't like who I was when I didn't work and was unemployed for a while. I was passive and partying too much; I wasted time and money. I was laid off at a young age. This is why I work hard, hoping that I don't get laid off again. For the longest time, friends and family who were close to me mentioned that I take work too seriously. They noticed that I put all my energy to work before everything, including school. Since I was doing this for a while, it was difficult for me to balance all my classes.
Recently, I am learning to put school first. My mom and some friends remind me that it is important for me to put school first. So that I can gain my aspiring career within time. They also remind me that my current job in the moment is only a stepping stone. My cousin reminded me a couple times, to let her know when I want to intern for a national magazine in New York; she has connections through marketing. During last Christmas break, my best friend's fiance told me that if I ever move back home, he can introduce me to his friend. His friend is a creative writer for Pixar.
The connections are there and I have a strong work ethic; all I need is the paper. Graduation seems so far away, but time will zoom by so fast. Until then, everyday I am practicing to equally distribute my time and energy in all areas of life. Now when I see the same older man at the store, I make sure to slow down when he rings me up. Before he can say anything, we both laugh; I tell him, "I'm taking it easy."
photos via Pinterest
decreasing the speed, with the press of the breaks,
Deanna
